I am in a vortex of obligation.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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