laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
