I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Randomize
