I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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