New invention idea: vibrating tampons
worst night to have a conscience
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
No more Irish car bombs ever.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
