Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize