I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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