Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I could have mohawked her pubes.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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