your thong is hanging out like whoa
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
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