His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize