saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Randomize
