he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
