just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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