I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
