I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
