but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Randomize
