white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
