It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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