After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize