Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
