I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
