I didn't shave. On purpose
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Randomize
