I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
