party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
