when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
