What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
