smell my finger.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
