I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
