honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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