I only kidnapped one of them. chill
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
