All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
