How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
