Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
