Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
