How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
