: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
