Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize