Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
