Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
