sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize
