Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
