He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
