Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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