The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
