whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Randomize
