I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I have tasted many bathrooms
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
