im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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