This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
