I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
she pinky promised me she was 18
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
