remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
